Understanding and Overcoming Triggers
Have you ever found yourself suddenly overwhelmed by a flood of emotions, seemingly out of nowhere? They can happen anywhere at work, in relationships or even interacting with complete strangers.
What are Triggers?
A trigger is simply an unhealed emotional wound, igniting intense reactions based on past experiences or associations. They can range from sights, sounds, smells, or even certain words that evoke memories or emotions tied to past events. Triggers can send us hurtling back into the past, reliving old wounds or traumas as if they were happening all over again.
We think people trigger us but they are just holding mirrors up to our triggers. As Wayne Dyer explained in a simple way: if I squeeze an orange what comes out of it? Juice. Why is that? Because the orange can only produce orange juice nothing else, regardless of who squeezes it. Triggers operate in a similar way. If there is an unresolved emotional issue within us regardless of who interacts with us and says something that makes us angry or upset we feel those emotions because they were already simmering beneath the surface. Perhaps we simply weren’t aware of them.
These reactions actually indicate that there is a part of us that requires attention. They provide us with an opportunity to reflect and observe our reactions and behaviours in certain situations, which can enable us to heal. However, practicing this can be difficult because we often have subconscious reactions to emotional triggers.
An important aspect to keep in mind when we are addressing triggers is to separate ourselves from the emotional reactions that arise.
Identifying Triggers:
Identifying triggers is like detective work for the soul. Pay attention to your emotional reactions and patterns. Notice when you suddenly feel overwhelmed, anxious, or upset, seemingly without reason. Ask yourself, "What just happened? What thoughts or memories came to mind?" These clues can help uncover the triggers lurking beneath the surface.
Keeping a diary is extremely useful. Using a journal to write down times when you were triggered, how you felt, how you reacted can provide valuable information. As you note down all this information you can learn a great deal about yourself and uncover things you may not have been aware of before.
For every emotional reaction there is an underlying issue. Usually these come from childhood or from past experiences that left us with high emotional charge. The more you observe yourself and your reactions in certain situations the more insight you gain. Understanding why you react emotionally in different situations empowers you to choose how you respond.
Common Triggers:
Triggers come in different ways, but some common ones include: Specific Places or Situations: Certain locations or situations may evoke memories or emotions associated with past experiences.
People: Interactions with specific individuals, whether positive or negative, can trigger emotional responses.
Anniversaries or Milestones: Dates or events linked to significant memories or experiences can act as triggers.
Sensory Stimuli: Sights, sounds, smells, or tastes that resemble past experiences can trigger emotional reactions.
How to use Triggers for Growth:
Once you've identified your triggers, you're already halfway to reclaiming your power. Awareness is key to breaking free from their grip.
1. Acknowledgement take a deep breath and acknowledge what's happening. Allow the energy to go through you. Remind yourself that you're not reliving the past – you're experiencing a trigger, and you have the power to respond differently.
2. Observe what you are going through and write down in your journal. It may seem very hard at the beginning but the more you practice to observe instead of reacting the easier it will become over time. Each time you observe your reaction acknowledge it. Avoid giving yourself a hard time by saying things like: ‘oh, not again’, or ‘here it comes again’… As these statements reinforce the idea that something is wrong with you. Instead be patient and grateful that you have noticed the reaction this time and give yourself time to process it.
3. Self Compassion be gentle with yourself. Remind yourself that it's okay to feel triggered, and offer yourself the same kindness you would to a friend.
4. Seek support reach out to trusted friends, family members, or a therapist for support and guidance. You don't have to face triggers alone.
The Power of Healing
Healing from triggers is a journey, not a destination. With patience, self-compassion, and support, you can learn to navigate life's emotional landmines with grace and resilience. In the journey of self-discovery, embracing triggers as opportunities for growth is a transformative act of courage. As we unravel the mysteries of our triggers, we reclaim our power and rewrite the narrative of our lives.